Struggles on the Path

We all have times of inner conflict when it comes to our spiritual path. We change, we explore, we learn. Talk about how your spiritual path is going. Have you had any struggles that have been particularly important to you in getting where you are? Share how you got through the tough times and what it taught you. Do you think there will be ever a moment when we will just get it and no longer be seeking?

My spiritual path is on autopilot. I've gotten a few books to help me get going again but I haven't done any reading for a while. I think the problem was that there are pages and pages of basic information, both paper and electronic. So once I'd absorbed all the basic information I wanted, I had nowhere to go. I've found a few books geared toward "adepts," but I don't think of myself as "adept." I think of myself as intermediate -- definitely no longer a beginner.

I haven't really had any struggles. I'm not closed about my faith but I don't shout it rom the rooftops. I'm by no means a fundamentalist witch, clad in black from head to toe with pentacles painted on the house. However I did have some fun Halloween before last with kids & parents asking what I was supposed to be and I said, "I'm a witch." Ah, very freeing. I guess I belong to the don't ask, don't tell school of religion. I don't want to hear about your religion and I won't subject you to mine. However, if someone asks, I'm very eager to talk about it. That's one of the great things about being able to express my faith here in the Pagan Speak collab or on my webpages. If someone's looking for it, there it is. If they don't want it, the can go somewhere else.

One "struggle" I've had is getting my husband to think of witchcraft as a religion. I don't know how he sees it but I think it's somewhere between hobby and faith. We talk about it quite a bit, but only up to a point. He's not embarrassed by my "witchy things" although I think some things give him the creeps. He does like the athame and bolline however. He hates the incense.

The last personal event that took place in the context of my former faith was my wedding. But it was a very modern, feminist affair (with a female minister). I felt it was good to end my experience on a high note. However, since I've been practicing Wicca 100%, my husband and I became godparents to our nephew. I made it a point to say, "I'm not Catholic." But the response was "That's okay." And when it came time to do these answers about teaching him the "ways of the church," I said nothing. My husband said, "Yes." But I think my job as a "spirit parent" will definitely include showing him the magic of everyday life and teaching him to question his spirituality. Hard to tell as he's only turning five this month.

As far as seeking goes, I think religion is seeking and questioning. I hope I never stop questioning or seeking. I want to keep adding layers to my faith. It's one of the things I love about Wicca. I can structure my faith in a way that is meaningful to me. I hope I never "get it." It's the journey that I find most appealing.